Apple Juice
by fairytellerxo
Summary: Angel Reyes is flawed. He’s selfish, he’s selfless, he’s kind and he’s rough. He’s all over the place and just trying to figure his shit out while trying not to ruin the one person who has stayed with him regardless of his shit. He’s broken but he’s trying.


Broken home baby

I can never blame you

No one ever taught you how to love right

No one ever taught you how to stand by

When it's uphill

And more times this love is just uphill

You're always fighting something

You never stop running

You don't even bother tryna keep your smile

Let me take you back, boy let me try

We might be alright

Perfect ain't coming but we'll be alright

You just gotta, just gotta love me

Don't let goodbyes come too easy

Love me, just let me know that you need me

Love me, I'll teach you how to love me, love me

… 

This story was inspired by the song Apple Juice by Jessie Reyez as well as Broken by They and Jessie Reyez.

…

Angel Reyes rolled over and looked at the brunette who was currently sound asleep in his bed. It wasn't his girlfriend and he knew that once she found out, he would be in trouble. His girlfriend always seemed to find out when he fucked up. He didn't even know why she was still around, actually he knew exactly why because he always dropped to his knees, showed his vulnerability, let out a string of I love yous and I will change. Followed by his golden phrase, I'm broken, I just gotta get my shit together.

He sighed moving out of the bed and into the bathroom, staring at his reflection in the mirror for a few moments. He looked like hell but that wasn't new. It had been a weekend of drinking and partying. A string of women who he never bother to catch the names of. It was mindless and stupid but what happened on a run, always stayed on a run until he got drunk and spilled the beans to his girl, Yesenia. It was his routine and his inability to cope with guilt that eventually chewed away at him before he copped to his fuck ups.

The man moved back out of the bathroom, grabbing his clothes and pulling them on haphazardly. Not giving a fuck if he looked like hell. All he cared about was getting the hell out of his current situation. He shoved his feet into his boots before slipping out of the apartment and down the cement stairs, fishing a cigarette from his pocket and placing it between his lips. "Shit," he patted his chest for his lighter before checking his pants and finding it.

"I've been calling you," EZ appeared out of the shadows, eyeing his brother carefully. "Knew I'd find you here still. You good to ride?"

"Yeah," he shrugged as he walked past his brother and towards his bike. "You didn't have to come and get me. I'm capable of checking my phone and getting myself where I need to be."

EZ nodded slowly as he dropped his pace to match Angel's. "Yeah but you turned your phone off. Have you checked it?" He shook his head. "Of course not. Yessie blew me up, she's in the hospital. Someone ran her off the fucking road."

"Is she okay?" He looked at his younger brother, panic settling under his skin. "Is she good?"

"Yeah, she's gonna survive it," he shrugged. "She's pretty banged up, I let Bishop know I was going to head back, check on her if I couldn't find you." He sighed. "She'll be good."

Angel nodded. "Thanks man, you can stick around. I'm gonna go home, check on her."

.

.

.

Angel Reyes walked through the hospital, his mind racing as he tried to figure out how to explain to Yessie that his phone was off when he had told her it would be on. He had stopped home, showered, changed and grabbed clothes for the woman. His guilt already bubbling up in the back of his throat as he drew nearer to her hospital room. He looked around, catching his reflection in the window before he walked in the room. "Hey."

Yesenia turned her head slowly, looking at the man before smiling softly. "Hey." She eased herself up into a seated position before sighing. "I feel worse than I look." She shrugged. "Which is saying a lot because I look terrible."

He moved to her and grabbed her hand. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have turned my phone off. I just needed some peace and quiet." He sat on the edge of the bed and smiled. "You do look pretty fucked. What happened?"

"I don't know, it happened so quick. This guy cut me off and I had to swerve to miss hitting another car and a truck struck me and I rolled." She shook her head slowly before adjusting again in the bed. "It hurts so bad but I'm happy that I'm whole and alive." She closed her eyes briefly. "I did find out some news though while being here."

Angel turned himself to face her. "Did they get the guy?" His eyebrows rose in curiosity as he studied her face before reaching out and stroking her cheek. "What's this news?"

"They did get him, he was drunk." She raked her teeth over her bottom lip before looking at him. "I'm pregnant."

"Pregnant?" He eyed her carefully. "What are we going to do?"

She shrugged. "I don't know about you but I want to keep the baby. Even if it means we break up because you don't want a kid." She shook her head. "I cannot imagine terminating this pregnancy. I got to hear the heartbeat already. I'm two months along." She gestured to a stack of papers on the side table. "Got to see the blob and everything."

Angel grabbed the papers and started to flip through them. His guilt still at the back of his throat as he tried to make sense of what he was seeing and what he was being told. Pregnant. Yessie was pregnant which mean he was going to be a dad if he opted in for the parent thing. He didn't see himself being a deadbeat but he also didn't know if he'd be any good. He was barely any good with being a man and a boyfriend. He chuckled softly. "I'm going to fuck this kid up." He looked at her. "I don't know how to be a dad."

"I don't know how to be a mom," She shrugged. "But I'm willing to give it my all and be the mom I need to be for this kid. All we can do is try our best and know not to do what our parents did." She squeezed his hand. "If you want out, just let me know. It doesn't have to be today. Think it over." She nodded slowly. "Angel, I know you'll be an amazing dad. If you try."

MAYANS 

It had been two weeks since Angel found out that Yessie was pregnant with his kids. Two weeks of him being inside of his head as he attempted to make sense of it all. He didn't know why Yessie wanted to keep the baby, why she'd want to have a kid with him after all he had put her through. It had also been two weeks of him playing dutiful boyfriend. Waiting on the brunette hand and foot. Making sure she was comfortable at the order of the doctors.

He couldn't stress the baby out, he couldn't already fuck his kid up. The kid deserved a fighting chance. He or she was going to be born into a dysfunctional family right off the bat. The kid needed some sanity and he was happy that the kid would have EZ as an uncle. "Yesenia!"

"What?" Yesenia walked out of the kitchen. "What's wrong?" She eyed him carefully as he laid on the living room floor. "What the fuck are you even doing?"

"I'm looking through picture albums," he tilted his head back to look at her. "From my childhood." He sighed. "My mom was the glue, she held us together and everything's gone to shit since she's been gone." He held up a picture. "You sure you want a kid with me?"

"I have no choice," she shook her head before moving to him and lowering herself to the floor. "Angel, I'm here for you. You just gotta let me know what's going through that mind of yours and what you need. I'm here to help you out Angel. You're not in this alone, no matter what you've programmed yourself to believe."

He let her place his head in her lap before closing his eyes. "You have a choice, more than one. Abort or raise the kid without me." He sighed as he felt her nails trail across his scalp. He had to give it to her, she knew how to make him feel good physically and mentally. He just needed to figure out how to make himself feel just as good. "I don't get it, why me? Why stay with me? After all the fucking shit I've put you through?"

Yesenia looked down at him and smiled to herself. "Hopeful. I know the guy I first fell in love with it still in there somewhere. I know losing your mom did irreversible damage and that you haven't figured shit out but I just can't bring myself to give up on you. We have so many amazing moments and then it looks like we're right there and we're going to make it and you withdraw and close off. You deserve to be happy Angel, you just gotta let yourself be happy. We're not chasing perfection, this love just has to be worth it at the end of the damn day and I think it is. It's up to you to figure it out. It's always your choice, stay or go? It's about what you want and need now Angel. It's not my responsibility to make you happy and it's not yours to make me happy. You can't make me happy if you can't make yourself happy. I'm gonna be happy with or without you but I'd prefer you to be included in this happiness. It's your choice baby."


End file.
